Tuesday, August 23, 2011

My first weekend away

Josie was 14 months and 1 week when I left her for the first time overnight.  I know most mom’s have done this long before I did, but that is a choice I made and I’m fine with it.  I am happy as a clam at home with her, playdates, pool adventures, going to the zoo and whatever else we can come up with.  She and Kyle are the loves of my life and I just don’t want to be away.  So, the though of leaving her for a few days was TERRIBLE.  I had a pit in my stomach for weeks about it, didn’t want to talk about it, and avoided conversation about it.

I decided it would be good for me to go to a convention in San Francisco for Stella & Dot.  So…that meant 4 days and 3 nights away from Josie.  Kyle was taking Thursday and Friday off of work and of course he would be with her over the weekend.  I knew she was in perfectly capable hands, but that didn’t matter.  That wasn’t the point.  I was going to be away from her without access to those kissable cheeks, hugs, giving her a bottle before she goes to bed – my favorite time of the day, playing on the floor until my bum was numb…I just didn’t want to go. 

Kyle and Josie took me to the airport Thursday morning and I sat in the back of the car with her.  We played and talked and then we were there….DENVER INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT.  I’m the first to admit, I was hysterical, tears pouring out of my eyes and was a second away from getting back in the car to go home.  Thankfully I had checked in online so I didn’t have to show my red, make-up streaked, puffy eyed, face to anyone yet.  I composed myself, made it through security and then I saw my friend Kelly, and it started all over.  All she did was ask me how I was doing. 

Once we arrived, I was doing better.  I didn’t shed another tear and it really was a good weekend for all three of us.  I knew Kyle and Josie could survive without me, and I survived too. 

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